It’s Official: Raines is a Slow-Talker

We had a parent-teacher conference this week.  I was oddly nervous…like I was about to get in trouble or something.  I don’t know. But anyway, we met with Lauren, Raines’ teacher.  She described Raines as creative, a thinker, and an old soul.  Funny how these same words come up to describe R, over and over again.  But then she added that he sometimes has trouble getting his thoughts out.


Apparently, he thinks.  And sort of struggles…to get his thoughts out?  Or rather, he just takes his own sweet time making his point.  He talks slowly.  A slow talker.

We stare at Lauren, digesting this little tidbit.  Mike clears his throat.

“Well….” he starts.  Thinks.  Then finally, “I’m not sure…I…really…don’t…see…that there’s actually….a problem…here.”

I can’t imagine where Raines gets it from.

Lauren (giggling) agreed that it probably isn’t a problem.  “But he sometimes gets frustrated”  she noted.  “Because other kids don’t always wait for him to finish.”

Mike’s all, “Story of my life, Babe” and I’m all WHAT??? WHO DOESN’T LISTEN TO HIM?  I WANT NAMES.  NOW.

But it gets worse:  Evidently, Raines walked up to a little girl in his class and asked her if he could play.   Know what that b*tch said?  NO.  SHE SAID NO.  To my baby.

Teacher Lauren was all, “Raines is so sensitive, and it’s soooo great because blah blah blah and the other kids who are just learning about empathy can directly see blah blah blah”  and I couldn’t really hear or even see straight because all I could picture was my poor little man, with his feelings hurt, at school, where Mum couldn’t give him a hug and make it all better.  Kill me now.  Kill me dead.

ps.  Emma or Evie or Ella or whatever your name was?  Yeah…see this kid?  This kid right here?

He is awesome.  Suck it.


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7 Responses to It’s Official: Raines is a Slow-Talker

  1. Erica says:

    Oh my god…we still have all of this ahead. I don’t know if I can handle it.

  2. Slow talkers rule the world, E girl will realize that someday and rue the day she dissed your man!

  3. jyll says:

    Emma or Evie or Ella or whatever your name is….suck it double!

  4. Jen says:

    He is a beautiful, smart boy with fantastic hair and a great Mom and Dad. 😉 Hold tight to the fact that he is fabulous! I’m sure those circumstances stung, but you might just be raising a genius:

    ‘It’s not a modern thing to be worried about development of speech etc. . . . As a child, Einstein seldom spoke. When he did, he spoke very slowly – indeed, he tried out entire sentences in his head (or muttered them under his breath) until he got them right before he spoke aloud. According to accounts, Einstein did this until he was nine years old. Einstein’s parents were fearful that he was retarded. One interesting anecdote, told by Otto Neugebauer, a historian of science, goes like this: As Einstein was a late talker, his parents were worried. At last, at the supper table one night, he broke his silence to say, “The soup is too hot.” Greatly relieved, his parents asked why he had never said a word before. Albert replied, “Because up to now everything was in order.”’

    Mumsnet; Joffe, Natasha; Roberts, Justine (2011-06-06). Why did nobody tell me?: Home truths every parent needs to know (Mumsnet) (p. 10). Bloomsbury UK. Kindle Edition.

  5. Lyn says:

    My 3 yr old is in a mother’s day out 1 day a week. He told me that one of the kids didn’t want to play with him because “he’s not my best friend’. I know he’s got 2 other buddies that he plays with all the time but I seriously want to mess that kid up for not wanting to play with my baby!

  6. April says:

    Strangely this made me teary while I laughed. Teary because my Jack is a little reserved at school and gets his feelings hurt while I am not there to offer hugs. Laughing because I too want to tell little Lola or Colton where to stick it.

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