Raines has been waking up early and READY to GO. Like, now. He literally opened his eyes this morning and shrieked, “WAKE UP MUM!! WHY YOU NO WAKE UP???”
Geez, kid. It’s 6:30AM. WHY YOU NO SWEEP UNTIL 8 LIKE YOU USED TO?
We need some serious blackout curtains. We eventually got up, and wandered into the kitchen to make coffee, etc. I’m still bleary-eyed, Raines is not.
Raines: Mum? 1-2-free-4….18–9-26…so many! Why so many wheels on the stroller?
Me: What? Oh…ummm….
Raines: TONS of wheels Mum! Never SEEN so many! Why so, SO many? So many wheels?
Me: Well, I think-
Raines: See this muscle? It BIG and STRWONG. I am SO BIG and SO STRWONG cause I eat WOTS ‘n WOTS of SPINACH. MUM YOU SEE THIS MUSCLE? MUM? MUM????
Raines: MUM!!!!!! YOU NOT LISTENING TO ME, MUM!!! WHY YOU NOT LISTENING TO ME???
Me: Raines, I’m just-
Raines: ARRRGGGH!!! [flops down on floor]
Raines: I have to pee!!!!!!!!!!!!
[runs into bathroom. Silence.]
Raines [yelling from bathroom]: MUM, I MISSED IT!
[sound of little feet padding back into kitchen]
Raines: Mum, I missed it.
Me: You what? Missed what?
Raines: Potty, Mum. I jus’ trwied and trwied but the pee goed EVERYWHERE. I missed it Mum. Pee was FAST.
Me: Wait! What? You peed on the floor?
Raines: Yup. WOTS ‘n WOTS.
Me: I need more coffee.