Geez, kid. It’s 6:30AM. WHY YOU NO SWEEP UNTIL 8 LIKE YOU USED TO?
We need some serious blackout curtains. We eventually got up, and wandered into the kitchen to make coffee, etc. I’m still bleary-eyed, Raines is not.
Raines: Mum? 1-2-free-4….18–9-26…so many! Why so many wheels on the stroller?
Me: What? Oh…ummm….
Raines: TONS of wheels Mum! Never SEEN so many! Why so, SO many? So many wheels?
Me: Well, I think-
Raines: See this muscle? It BIG and STRWONG. I am SO BIG and SO STRWONG cause I eat WOTS ‘n WOTS of SPINACH. MUM YOU SEE THIS MUSCLE? MUM? MUM????
Raines: MUM!!!!!! YOU NOT LISTENING TO ME, MUM!!! WHY YOU NOT LISTENING TO ME???
Me: Raines, I’m just-
Raines: ARRRGGGH!!! [flops down on floor]
Raines: I have to pee!!!!!!!!!!!!
[runs into bathroom. Silence.]
Raines [yelling from bathroom]: MUM, I MISSED IT!
[sound of little feet padding back into kitchen]
Raines: Mum, I missed it.
Me: You what? Missed what?
Raines: Potty, Mum. I jus’ trwied and trwied but the pee goed EVERYWHERE. I missed it Mum. Pee was FAST.
Me: Wait! What? You peed on the floor?
Raines: Yup. WOTS ‘n WOTS.
Me: I need more coffee.