You know how sometimes, no matter how much “trouble” your two-year old is in, they can make you crack up laughing? Yeah, me too.
We bought Raines a toilet seat. We haven’t quite started potty-training yet, but we’re getting close. Anyway, we bought the seat that fits on top of the real toilet. I unwrapped it, and Raines helped me put it together. You basically peel off the backing on four foam stickers and put them on the bottom of the little seat. They protect the toilet and help to keep the seat in place.
So Raines and I are playing in the living room. I look down and see, stuck to the floor, a foam sticker EXACTLY like the ones we stuck to the bottom of his toilet seat a half-hour ago. I sigh, peel up the sticker, and walk down the hall to put it back on the little toilet seat. When I pick up the seat, I realize that ALL of the stickers are missing.
“RAINES!” I yell. “Where are the other stickers?” Raines comes running in. I show him the toilet seat with the missing foam stickers. “Stickers like this one, Raines. Where did you put them?” Raines gives me his innocent face, turns his palms skyward and says, “Whap HAPpend, Mum? Whap HAPpend?” This phrase is his version of “I have NO idea who possibly could’ve done something like this.”
Staredown ensues. I try again:
“Raines. I need to find these stickers. Show Mummy where you put the stickers.”
More wide-eyed innocence. More hands skyward, shrugging his little shoulders. Another chorus of “whap HAPpends???”, each one getting more emphatic than the last.
And then I saw them. All three of them.
Stuck, oh-so-carefully to the front of his shirt.